The cat’s answer to Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe, Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed is a hilarious collection of full-color photos and letters of excuses and suggestions from cats to the people who love them—no matter what bad thing they’ve done!
In this hilarious book of tongue-in-cheek poetry, the author of the internationally syndicated comic strip Sally Forth helps cats unlock their creative potential and explain their odd behavior to ignorant humans. With titles like “Who Is That on Your Lap?,” “This Is My Chair,” “Kneel Before Me,” “Nudge,” and “Some of My Best Friends Are Dogs,” the poems collected in I Could Pee on This perfectly capture the inner workings of the cat psyche.
TheOatmeal.com’s most popular cat jokes, including “How to Pet a Kitty” and “The Bobcats,” plus 15 new and never-before-seen catthemed comics, are presented in this hilarious collection from New York Times best-selling author Matthew Inman, a.k.a. TheOatmeal.com. Includes pull-out poster!
Long gone are the good old days when a cat’s biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives. Written in a simple Q&A format, How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety answers crucial questions such as, “What is the right age to talk to my cat about the proper use of firearms?” and “What are the benefits of my cat living a lifestyle of abstinence?” and especially “Why does my cat need to use the internet? Can’t he just play with yarn like cats used to do?”
Gleaned from the purrspective of nine lives lived, this priceless advice for enjoying a stress-free life comes straight from adorable kitty gurus who care enough to share how they’ve lived and learned.
Texts from Mittens is a series of text message conversations between a snappy, self-absorbed housecat named Mittens and his long-suffering human, a single woman who works away from home during the day. Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the “filthy beast” dog, Phil.
This clever parody combines two of the Internet’s hottest sensations–cats and craigslist. With 160 hilarious classified ads written for cats, by cats, whiskerslist reveals the inner lives of our favorite furry friends like never before.
Our feline friends have spent eons observing, napping, pondering, napping, and taking notes about the human condition. In between naps, they’ve realized that we humans could use some catlike guidance when it comes to handling the ups and downs of life. In this book they’ve condescended to share their invaluable wisdom in short advice columns such as “Always Stay at Least 30 Feet from a Loved One” and “Never Let Anyone Dress You.” Whether it’s coping with romance, surviving a social gathering, or clawing your way to the top of the corporate ladder only to realize you can’t get down, the cats in this book will have you relaxed and ready to take on the world! Just after one more nap.
Anyone who is a cat lover knows that the cat rules the roost, and that certainly doesn’t change at bedtime. You might be ready to sleep, but you can bet that kitty is ready for just about anything but some shut-eye. Release your frustrations with a good laugh as you read along with Rosa and her struggle to get her cat to Stop Meowing and Go the F*ck to Sleep!